Rule#98: Always Brine the Bird
Life is complicated and hard. And some of the things I say in this blog are meant to simplify and focus your choices in life. I try my best to be profound, but with the passage of time, when I’m long gone, you might find them to be the ramblings of a delusional old man.
There are sprinkled in these life rules for my kids some absolutes- things that I am certain of beyond a doubt . This is one of them … Always Brine your Bird.
As a young man I wasn’t sure I’d ever get married. I certainly wasn’t thinking I would one day be the father of 6 kids. Life as it often does, sort of happened to me, and I went with the flow of where I felt I was being guided by the universe.
So along the way I had to learn life skills, survival cooking was one of them. I learned how to cook for my family, and actually found that I really enjoyed it. But like a hack comedian I like playing to a big room – the more people the better I think I cook.
Turkey is one of those foods that screams groups and family. Nobody thinks at 5 pm on a Tuesday , ” Boy I’d like to cook a turkey for us to eat while watching the new season of Yellowstone”. You think about turkey when you are going to have “company”.
Company requires prep. You have to clean the bathrooms, pick up the clutter and think about a meal that every one will need to wear their stretchy pants. Turkey is one of those foods that immediately comes to mind.
Turkey is warm, plentiful and if done right juicy. It is perfect because people can bring there own sides to help add to the feast. In fact my turkey dressing has been known to cure cancer.
But Turkey is always center stage. And if you are having a bunch of your friends over for a meal that bird better dance, or the whole meal will end with people stopping by the Taco Bell drive through on the way home. Its critical that you do it right.
No matter which brand bird you choose, fresh or frozen the most critical step is in the prep. Specifically the brine. You MUST brine the bird, even if its only for 4 hours- but 24 is ideal.
Turkey as with all poultry can be pretty bland and tasteless. It can also become terribly dried out in the cooking process ( if possible I recommend smoked).
As all things in life .. your relationships, your work and your family it is the prep time that matters. Life can be pretty bland and boring if you are not thinking of things to spice things up. We have to take what we are given in life and add the spices to make it fun and exciting. This is especially true when it comes to turkeys. It also works with wives and foot rubs. But that is another rule…
So for a Brine recommend a citrus brine…
- 1 cup Sea Salt
- 1 Lemon , cut into Wedges
- 1 Orange , cut into wedges
- 1 medium onion , cut into wedges
- 3 cloves of garlic ( because the soul is made of garlic)
- 4 bay leaves
- 1 tablespoon if dried thyme
- 1 1/2 gallons of water
- 1 cup of bourbon ( because, why the hell not)
- 1/2 cup of sugar
I always use a completed defrost bird, and after mixing the ingredients together submerge the bird in a bucket- adding about 1/2 a cup of ice before refrigerating.
You can’t rush prep in life. Time is the secret ingredients to a good sex life, successful business and good turkey- take you time. Too much and your wife falls asleep, too little and everyone is disappointed. Time matters.
At least 4 hr, but no more than 24 remove the bird and pat it dry. You can then add your own special dry spices before cooking. Finding your unique signature to your bird is part of the fun and magic of cooking. I like using fresh rosemary and dried thyme- coating the bird a mixture of mayo and butter. Yes, I said mayo- don’t judge until you try it. It is ideal for smoking a bird and helps with a prefect browning.
Lastly cooking a turkey requires carving and presentation. This is a prefect time for reflection. Reflection on the gift of friends and family, the joy of sharing a meal with those you love and the blessing of being together.
Happy Thanksgiving.